The Emergency Broadcast System: A Dollop of Dopamine

After reading Orwell’s, 1984 in 1975, I developed a fear of the Emergency Broadcasting System similar to the horror some people experience at seeing clowns or midgets:  Such trepidation may be unfounded, and yet, I get the willies.  To be clear, I don’t fear the system itself (I’m not certain there is a system; after all, there’s no border), but the test, the sound with which we are all familiar, the obnoxious, alien audible, and that pattern: EEE!  EEE!  EEE!  EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!  Since the ‘70s, upon hearing the first syllable of that twisted scream, I’ve jumped to turn off the radio or television.  Remote controls made it easier, but if in a position where I can’t reach the set or remote, I cover my ears and sing John Prine’s, Dear Abby, in double time with gusto.  I have similar although lesser consternation for repetitious announcements given in baggage claim areas at airports or subliminal messages in Hollywood movies.  I have the feeling something is up, things are not as they appear, but rather, a devious and sinister plot is upon us, a method of behavior control practiced by our government, not unlike but clearly more surreptitious than campaigns to end smoking, obesity, use of fossil fuels, and to not only accept but wax obsequious and fawning before people and practices once abhorred.  Sometimes, especially being Americans, we balk at instruction, despite all studies, lectures, counseling, PSAs, mandates, regulations and finger wagging of our own children, even if it’s for our own good.  That’s when the government steps in to provide a little nudge, and if the nudge has no effect, then it’s a push, a shove and then….well:  EEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!  I don’t know exactly how it works, when it’s used or for what specific purpose, but I have a theory.  This is not science fiction.  This is possible.  After all, the government doesn’t give away free cell phones, or give anything without ulterior motives.   I believe, at birth, our brains are implanted with a chip, about the size of a Viagra pill, and oddly, with the same shape and color, but that’s only the veneer.  It’s electronic, like a transponder, and whenever they “test” the emergency broadcasting system, give a canned airport announcement, or flash subtle patterns on a Hollywood movie screen, it activates, but just long enough to release a microscopic dollop of dopamine or whatever chemical makes us calm, happy with our lot and as content as California cows—I’ll have to check with my son on this as he studied psychology with some intent; it could be a variety of chemicals…I don’t know.  But, clearly, it’s not working as designed; indeed, it appears to be having the opposite effect, typical of government programs.  Our country is a mess; if it were an airplane, all gauges would be red-lined with stick shakers rattling our teeth, annunciators flashing, horns and bells going off, and the dreaded, “TERRAIN!  TERRAIN!  PULL UP!  PULL UP!”  But that’s only my opinion; we could be doing fine.  I’m sure some would say I need to uncover my ears and hear the siren’s call, remove the scales from my eyes and see.  I don’t know, pal.  If this is the reality I am to accept, I don’t want to hear it, and I don’t want to see it.  EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!